The family is a group of people related by blood or law, living together or being united with one another for a common purpose. That purpose is usually to provide shelter and food, and to bring up children. There is another definition of the word family. It is "two or more persons related by birth, marriage, or adoption, who reside together." Thus, a family can be two or more adult siblings living together, a parent and child or children, two adults who are related by marriage but have no children, or adults who adopt a child.
The nature of family keeps changing: there are a number of types of family that exist in a society at any time.
There used to be mainly two types of families: the extended and the nuclear. The extended family most often included mother, father, children, and some other relatives, such as grandparents, living in the same house or nearby. Then as job patterns changed and the economy progressed from agricultural to industrial, people were forced to move to different parts of the country for job opportunities. These moves split up the extended family. The nuclear family became more prevalent; it consisted of only the parents and the children.
In the Far, Middle and Near East and in parts of Africa, South America and Europe, the first thing most Western people notice is the respect everyone has for the old. Older men and women live with their married children and are important members of the family. They look after the children, help with the cooking, give advice and often rule family life. Living in an extended family has advantages for everyone. A small child, for example, knows many people from the very beginning, not just his mother and father. When his mother goes out, it doesn't matter. He'll stay with someone who loves him an aunt or sister or grandmother. For a young mother and father there are also advantages. They can go out to work and grandmother will look after the house and the children.
This is, especially important in farming communities, where both men and women work in the fields.
And the older woman, for example, has something important to do. She sees her children and grandchildren grow up. She is needed and loved. The nuclear family is the product of the West. The typical family consists of mother, father and two children. If the mother goes out to work, she must leave them with a stranger someone who looks after them as a job, for money. If there is a divorce or separation the child's life will change completely.
Of course, there can be problems when people of three generations live in the same house. Grandparents are often more permissive than parents, and they let children do what they want. But most parents feel that it is better to be strict; they feel that children should follow rules. Parents think that grandparents who don't make children mind (=obey) will spoil them. Then the children won't obey anyone as they are growing up.
But having grandparents at home can also be fun. For example, everyone enjoys the stories the older people tell and the interesting things that they can teach the other family members. Having elderly people at home can be a wonderful experience.
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On the other hand, too many elderly people live alone in special flats or homes. They hardly ever see their children and grandchildren. They have nothing important to do. They are often poor and lonely. In winter many old people die of cold or from falls in the house because there is no one to look after them. Nobody cares.
Besides these two types of traditional groupings, the word "family" is being extended to include a variety of other living arrangements. Today there is an increase in single-parent homes: a father or mother living with one or more children.
Blended families occur when previously married men and women marry again and combine the children from former marriages into a new family.
Some couples make up their mind not to have any children at all, so there is an increase in two-person childless families. There are also more people who live alone: single, widowed, divorced.
The matrifocal ( ( )) family consists of a mother and her children. This kind of family commonly develops where women have the resources to bring up their children by themselves, or where men have more mobility than women.
The conjugal family consists of one or more mothers and their children, and/or one or more fathers. This kind of family occurs commonly where a division of labor requires the participation of both men and women, and where families have relatively high mobility. The nuclear family is a subtype of the conjugal family.
The consanguineal family comes in various forms, but the most common subtype consists of a mother and her children, and other people usually the family of the mother. This kind of family commonly evolves where mothers do not have the resources to raise their children on their own, fathers are not often present, and especially where property changes ownership through inheritance.
The term cohabitation is most frequently applied to couples who are not married. It means living with a partner as husband and wife without official registering the marriage ties.
People may live together for a number of reasons. These may include wanting to test compatibility or to establish financial security before marrying. It may also be because they are unable to legally marry, because for example interreligious marriages are not legal or permitted. Other reasons include living with someone before marriage as a way to avoid divorce, a way to avoid the higher income taxes paid by some two-income married couples (in the United States), negative effects on pension payments (among older people), philosophical opposition to the institution of marriage and seeing little difference between the commitment to live together and the commitment to marriage. Some individuals may also choose cohabitation because they see their relationships as being private and personal matters, and not to be controlled by political, religious or patriarchal institutions.
Some couples prefer cohabitation because it does not legally commit them for an extended period, and because it is easier to establish and dissolve without the legal costs often associated with a divorce.
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Today, cohabitation is a common pattern among people in the Western world. More and more couples choose to have long-term relationships without marriage, and cohabit as a permanent arrangement.
Opposition to cohabitation comes mainly from religious groups. Opponents of cohabitation usually argue that living together in this fashion is less stable and hence harmful. According to one argument, the total and unconditional commitment of marriage strengthens a couple's bond and makes the partners feel more secure, more relaxed, and happier than those that have chosen cohabitation. Opponents of cohabitation commonly cite statistics that indicate that couples who have lived together before marriage are more likely to divorce, and that unhappiness, ill health, poverty, and domestic violence are more common in unmarried couples than in married ones.
In the United States the cohabiting population is inclusive of all ages, but the average cohabiting age group is between 25-34. The average married population is in this range too.
In Denmark, Norway and Sweden, cohabitation is very common; roughly 50% of all children are born into families of unmarried couples, whereas the same figure for several other Western European countries is roughly 10%. Some couples decide to marry later.
In the UK, 25% of children are now born to cohabitating parents.
Its hardly surprising that dancing and drinking until dawn are almost obligatory at weddings. The official registry procedure is a simple affair which covers the legal side of marriage which is followed by a wildly extravagant reception.
In fact, the fun starts well before the ceremony with the groom put through a series of challenges. As he climbs up to the brides apartment, he is likely to be attacked by a barrage of posters poking fun at his entrance into the married state. On each landing, he might be given a task to accomplish: a song or a dance to perform, or a question to answer on his brides preferences for chocolates or flowers. To prove himself truly worthy of his bride, he might have to identify her from her gaggle of girlfriends in unusual ways: each of them hiding behind a corner, for example, and extending their feet for him to choose from, or several of them kissing a piece of paper to leave their lipstick marks. Once hes won her hand, he can carry her off.
Now weddings are rather flamboyant, with long parades of beribboned cars, colourful showy outfits and a host of exotic entertainments at the reception. With guest lists often stretching into hundreds, there are a lot of people to impress. The traditional tour of the war memorials, when couples lay flowers to recognize their debt to those who scarified their lives, among the accompanying entourage of balloon-covered cars, loudly honking their horns, and the use of the occasion as a lengthy photo shoot, detract somewhat from the solemnity of the gesture. In Minsk, the most popular spots for such gatherings are beside the eternal flame in Victory Square and on the Isle of Tears in the River Svislach (the Afghan memorial).
Of course, one of the most important parts of the wedding is the marital kiss, manifesting the bride and grooms love for one another.. At every toast, guests proclaim the champagne to be bitter (shouting "Gorko!"). The only way to remedy the situation is for the newly-weds to kiss until the wine is transformed rendered sweet by their affection.
Needless to say, weddings are full of ancient traditions and superstitions. In Belarus, the rings are supposed to be placed in a bowl of grain, turning them into talismans of fertility. These are worn on the right hand (moving to the left as a sign of widowhood). After the ceremony, the grain is then thrown over the happy couple (rather like confetti) to ensure their life flourishes.
Modern-day brides and grooms are treated like royalty on their special day, a tradition that has been around for centuries. This used to be taken so seriously that the pair was forbidden to lift a finger in any way. Their mothers even fed them. They were addressed as a young prince and princess and sat on thrones.
A particularly Belarusian ritual is for the bride and grooms to stand upon a ruchnik cloth during the ceremony (white linen embroidered with intricate red patterns). Even today, the couple has their hands bound together with a ruchnik, symbolizing their union. Their wedding gifts are often wrapped in these ceremonial cloths.
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Certainly, love and romance will always be in fashion. Especially while state authorities push to improve the demographic situation. In Belarus, each woman is well aware that it is her sacred duty to have at least two children. Luckily, the authorities are willing to support this with financial incentives for raising a family. There is no doubt that wedded bliss is the way forward. As the saying goes: If you love someone, their little dacha becomes a palace.
Wedding Traditions in England and in Wales
Honeymoon
The term 'honeymoon' comes from the tradition of the bride drinking mead (drink made of honey) for one month after the wedding to encourage fertility, and a male child in particular.
Wedding Clothes
Most small towns have wedding shops so there is now a choice of bridal gowns. Coloured dresses are becoming more common, but ivory or white is still more popular.
. Brides rarely kept their gowns for their daughters; they either sold them or had the fabric used to make their first child's Christening gown. They wear "something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue, and a lucky sixpence in your shoe," as in the old English rhyme.
Today, it is the custom to have many young bridesmaids instead of adult attendants. The bride pays for her attendants outfits.
The bridegroom and a best man wear business suits. The waistcoat and coloured handkerchief that the groom and best man sometimes wear is normally the same colour as the bridesmaid's dresses.
Wedding Gifts
The use of bridal registries has become more popular in recent years. Family members may pass around the bride's general list of items she needs.
Wedding gifts are brought to the reception, or delivered directly to the couple before the wedding. Gifts are not usually opened until after the honeymoon, and then the thank you cards are sent.
Present- Day Wedding Traditions
At the age of 21 persons of both sexes in England come of age. Boys and girls are permitted to become "engaged" or betrothed, when still in their "teens". A boy can, with his parents consent, propose to a girl and then marry her before he is twenty-one years of age. He presents his bride-elect with an engagement ring, which is worn on the third finger of the left hand.
In ordinary speech, a man who, is engaged, but not yet married to a lady, when speaking about her, will say: "My intended" or "My fiancé." The young lady will say the same.
On the day of the wedding, the bridegroom and bride with the best man and brides maid, family and friends, go to church for the wedding service. There they are joined in matrimony by the clergyman, who slips a wedding-ring on the bride's ring finger. This ring she wears for the rest of her life.
Weddings are traditionally held at noon; afterward there is a seated luncheon, called a "wedding breakfast". The prominent feature of the wedding-breakfast is the highly-decorated "wedding-cake". The wedding cake is a rich fruitcake topped with marzipan; the top tier is called a "christening cake" to be saved for the birth of the first child. Chocolate or sponge cakes have become more popular in recent years.
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Photos are taken outside the church immediately after the ceremony, or inside if it is raining. While photos are being taken, relatives and close friends present the bride with wedding souvenirs - horseshoes, wooden spoons, rolling pins, all decorated with lace and ribbon.
The bride and groom dance the first dance but there is no introduction of wedding parties. There is a father/daughter, and mother/son dance.
They throw the bouquet, but rarely the garter.
After the guests have drunk the bride's and bridegroom's health, the happy newly--married couple takes leave and depart on their honeymoon or to their new home.
According to an old English custom, they get pelted, at the moment of leaving the room, with handfuls of rice or with old shoes and slippers, which is supposed to bring them good luck.
The generation gap is a popular term used to describe big differences between people of a younger generation and their elders, when older and younger people do not understand each other because of their different experiences, opinions, habits and behaviour.
The young of today do have problems. They are considered adults long before their parents were and it allows much more freedom. Unfortunately, it often makes life harder because teenagers are not adults. Although they look and act like adults, they lack experience and so often make mistakes which people dont understand.
Almost half of teenagers have an experience with drugs, alcohol and sex under the age of 16. A lot of teenagers who have drug or alcohol addiction almost never believe that they are dependent.. As for drinking, teenagers don't realize the harm it does to their health, they just don't want it to be the privilege of grown-ups. They really believe that certain drinks will make them look like they were accepted. So, we can say that the low level of self-appraisal is the main reason for drinking & drug problem.
These things are often combined with family and school problems. What has gone wrong? Some specialists explain that the changes of our society, the system of our life force young people to choose their own lifestyle. On the one hand, our society agrees that 15-17-year old people are old enough to be responsible for what they do and give them quite a lot of freedom and rights. On the other hand, most adults think that teenagers are too young to be taken seriously. This misunderstanding has produced many problems. Actually, a lot of teenagers say that their parents let them do anything they want and are quite indifferent to their problems. Many teenagers get upset or depressed when they can't solve their problems. As a result, it makes them believe that there is only one way out - to stop living and commit suicide.
Teenagers have psychological problems which can be explained by their psychological instability. This is the reason for their strange & sometimes aggressive behaviour. Their aggression can be aimed at their friends, teachers, parents & people around them. If these problems aren't solved & regulated by experienced specialists, psychologists, teachers it can lead to far more serious problems.
In general emotional problems for young people can be far more difficult than financial ones. The typical teenager problem is that nobody understands me. Youth is also the time to meet your first love. It is of course wonderful but it is widely known that first love often has an unhappy end. This also increases young peoples problems. Even friends cannot always stay friends. When young people begin to understand themselves a little bit better old friends sometimes just grow apart. And sometimes teenagers have problems in communicating with one another and they even stay alone.
There are different types of houses: the semi-detached house, the terrace house, the bungalow, the detached house, the tower block of flats, the bedsitter.
The semi-detached house. This type of house is built as one of a pair of houses which share a central wall. This saves lands because they do not have gardens all round like a detached house. The houses have perhaps a garage at the side. Many semi-detached houses were built in the 1920s and 1930s by private companies. They bought up land and developed estates of identical houses
The terrace house. The semi-detached house is still a favourite with the British builder and householder. But as building land becomes scarce, and therefore more expensive, the modern builder tends to build new houses in terraces. Terrace houses are attached to one another on both sides in a long row. They may be three or fours storeys high and have spacious rooms. This sort of terrace houses can be very expensive. The workmens houses of the 19th and early 20th centuries were built in terraces, too. There are miles of these older terrace houses in most towns. Over a quarter of British families live in them.
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The bungalow. It is the dream of many older people to buy a bungalow by the sea when they retire. All the rooms in a bungalow are on the ground floor, so it is particularly suitable type of home for older people. Unfortunately a bungalow needs more land than a house with the same amount of rooms, so bungalow developments take up a lot of building space and increase the problem of urban sprawl -the spread of build-up areas over the countryside.
The detached house. A detached house has land all around it and is the most expensive type of home. It has privacy from neighbours and is ideal for gardeners who have plenty of time to work in the garden.
A standard detached house usually has three or four bedrooms, living room and dining room. It also has a kitchen, two full size bathrooms (toilet, sink, bath/shower tub) on the main floor, a fireplace, a single or double car garage and a basement.
The tower block of flats. At the opposite extreme to the detached house are the high-rise flats with no gardens. Tower blocks of flats and offices rise up 18 or 20 storeys high along the sky-line of cities like London and Birmingham.
These flats were built in the 1950s and early 1960s to provide the most accommodation using the least amount of land. People wanted better housing and they were not prepared to live in the poor housing and the slums of pre-war times.
A mansion is a very large dwelling house. A traditional European mansion was a house with a ballroom and tens of bedrooms. Today, it is just a large and well-appointed house. The country house, as it is known in English-speaking places, is a variety of mansion. It was in the 16th century that mansions really began to be built with gardens, parks, and alleys. Mansions usually have special rooms meant for leisure activities. Some mansions have a greenhouse, while others have a pool or a home theatre.
The bedsitter. It is not only people and families with children who have housing problems; the single man or woman may have great difficulty in finding suitable accommodation. They can only afford one room. Unfortunately there are very few one-roomed flatlets. Unfurnished rooms are scarce.
The only accommodation available may be a furnished bedsitting room, called a bedsitter. People with large houses will sometimes let a room as a bedsitter. The person who lives in the room (the tenant) will pay rent to the owner (the landlord). Sometimes whole houses have been converted into flatlets and bedsitters.
