The opposite of competing. For accommodating style negotiators, the relationship is everything. Accommodating profiles think that the route to winning people over is to give them what they want. They don't just give products and services, they are generous with information too. Accommodators are usually very well liked by their colleagues and opposite party negotiators.
When to use?
When you or your company are at fault, repairing the relationship is critical, and if you have nothing else that would benefit the other side. i.e. an olive branch or gift to rebuild bridges. If you are in a very weak position then sometimes your best option is to give in gracefully. Think about it: if they can crush you, and they know it, what is likely to be the outcome if you resist? Yes, bring your own bandages. It may be worth (humbly) reminding them that you will both stand to lose if they put you out of business, and ask if they really want to push you out of that market. If you both intend to work together in the longer term, then refocus the negotiations on the longer term, thereby reminding the other side that their taking advantage of you now may hurt them in the future.
What's the Danger?
It is almost always a bad idea to accommodate when negotiating against high compete styles. With high compete negotiators your generosity will be seen as a sign of weakness to be taken advantage of. Giving away value early in the negotiation can leave you with a poor hand to play in the rest of the negotiation. With very little to offer, and relying upon the other side's generosity, you're gambling. Giving away value too easily too early can signal to your negotiation counterpart that you've very deep pockets, and your gift is just a taster of bigger and better gifts to come. To some negotiators, an accommodating style appears to promote harmonious relationships. What these accommodating profiles miss is the myriad of other options that create strong enduring relationships. Giving away the farm usually just creates one happy negotiator, and that's not you. Warning: The faulty thinking that puts accommodates into negotiation damage control is thinking that because the goal is unimportant to you, it must have little value to the other side. Remember to do your homework by asking the value of your concession to the other party before making your trade or concession.
Self Defense
When someone is offering you a gift at the negotiation table, do you humbly accept their generosity? Be careful, as theirs may be a proverbial 'Greek Gift' - i.e. they may be luring you into reciprocation, obliging you to give back something of greater value in return. So keep in mind the value of the item being given - the relative value to both sides. Make sure you don't give back something of disproportionately higher value in return.
You also need to be careful that they are not an incompetent negotiator, making big concessions that jeopardizes the viability of their business, or agreeing a deal that their managers will later veto. If they go bust because they are giving away too much, you could both end up losing.
Avoid (I Lose - You Lose)
This is most often referred to as "passive aggressive". People who habitually use this style really dislike conflict. Rather than talk directly with you about the issue, avoid styles may instead try to take revenge without you knowing about it. The avoid style can be a typical reaction to high compete negotiators. Sellers will frequently call less often on high compete buyers (i.e. Avoiding Competitive buyers) - and may choose to invest marketing money and share their best ideas and prize promotions with buyers who make themselves available (those who are not Avoiding the sales person.
When to use?
When the value of investing time to resolve the conflict outweighs the benefit; or if the issue under negotiation is trivial (trivial to both parties). Sometimes there is just not enough at stake to risk a difficult conflict situation. If there is a lot of emotion in a negotiation, it's pointless pushing through and hammering it out. Better to allow people to calm down first, let the testosterone hormone leave everyone's system first so that reason and rationality can reappear. At that point an avoid style is likely the most pragmatic alternative - suggest a timeout of 15-20 minutes.
What to do when you're dragged into a negotiation unprepared? Under these circumstances, avoidance is probably the most sensible strategy. Either avoid the meeting, or avoid discussing the issues upon which you need to prepare.
What's the Danger?
Whoever has the greater urgency will usually end up with the short end of the avoidance stick. Stalling is a common sales tactics, when sales / the vendor knows that procurement needs their product or service yesterday. Conversely a buyer may hold out until the last day of the a quarter or month, knowing that the sales person needs to meet his or her target. So be careful about what information you reveal about the urgency of your need.
When communication channels are cut off, you leave the other side to fill in the blanks. They may believe you need more time, or may think that you're no longer interested in a business relationship with them, resulting in their approaching your competition, or contemplating downsizing. Mutual resentment is likely to build up - leading to frosty impersonal relationships. Paradoxically, avoid profile negotiators are frequently seeking to avoid conflict - and their avoid style instead lands them in more conflict. When differences are eventually aired, emotions and negotiation positions are often more difficult and fixed than they need be.
Self Defense
Set clear expectations of timing early on in your negotiations. Best to be detailed in defining milestones with dates attached to each.If the other party is applying an avoid style, consider escalating the issue on one or both sides.Understand their decision making process and levels of responsibility. Having these insights can assist you in invalidating their reasons for avoiding, and will make your sharp questions more difficult to side-step. Escalation options will also be clearer to you.If you have a good enough relationship, then agree a process on resolving differences. As John F. Kennedy was quoted as having said: "The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining."
Compromise (I Lose / Win Some - You Lose / Win Some)
Too many people confuse the word 'Compromise' with 'negotiation'. In reality compromising is usually little more than haggling and splitting the difference, with no deep understanding or value creation having taken place. Compromising often involves one or both negotiators settling for less than they want or need, usually resulting in an end position of roughly half way between both party's opening positions. In the absence of a good rationale or properly exchanged trades, half way between the two positions seems "fair". What compromising ignores however, is that the people that take the most extreme positions tend to get more of what is on offer, and the path they're treading with blinkers on doesn't allow the pie to be expanded.
When to use?
When you are pushed for time and you are dealing with someone who you trust. They also need to be clear that it would not be in their best interest for them to "win" a cheap victory. Both parties win and lose - but make sure you win the right things and lose the right things. Meeting half way reduces strain on the relationship, but usually leaves precious gold on the table (and with the central banking cartel's gold suppression scheme losing its grip right now, every ounce of gold counts). When you have nothing left to offer, and this is the only way to seal the deal. i.e. a lousy situation.
What's the Danger?
When you use compromising as an excuse for not preparing properly. Without quality negotiation training, most negotiators wing it, and end up compromising. If the outcome of the negotiation is critical, then you should not compromise on things that you absolutely must have. One of the problems with compromising is: if you make concessions within your position with no strong rationale, the other party may assume that you are going to continue to make more concessions, and appeal to you using weak rationale.
Whichever negotiator starts with the more ambitious opening position wins the compromise. So calculate early on who stands to gain if it comes down to compromises. If you get known for being a compromise styled negotiator, look out! Your trading partners will wise up to your negotiation style and they will start to make more and more extreme opening positions. Bigger opening positions result in greater chances of deadlocks. Compromises cheat both sides out of innovative solutions. Learn from collaborative styles by making it safe to explore options together. Invite the other side to join you in 'what if' frames to explore possibilities, without the danger of being tied to your idea.
Self Defense
Only retreat within your position when you have a solid rationale for doing so, and when you're being rewarded in another way. i.e. make a reasoned exchange. Trade across goals and interest. All too often negotiators try resolve 1 single goal at time, before moving on to the next tabled agenda item. Stay with the problem or opportunity for longer. Don't give in so easily to the temptation of splitting differences until you've explored other alternatives. If the other side starts with an extreme opening position, be sure to quickly bring them back to reality, or counter balance with your own extreme position. Caution: extreme positions can lead to drawn out dog fights that result in more deadlocks.
