A. Head-and-Heart Listening
B. Clear Responsibilities
C. Family Discussions
D. Flexibility
E. Balanced Communication
F. Caring and Appreciation
G. Family Roots
H. Encouragement
1. Building a successful family is like building a home. Both need a plan. A successful family based on unity and love takes careful planning, but it's worth every moment. The best way to be organized as a family is to talk about family matters. By doing this, families enjoy a special closeness and stability. Choosing to spend time with your family sends a message more powerful than words. Memories made together during this time will bond and sustain your family through the years.
2. Family traditions promote feelings of warmth and unity. Trace your family tree and collect all the photographs of your ancestors that you can find. Public libraries and bookstores have books on genealogy for you to get you started. Compile a family oral history. Ask older relatives to talk about their parents and childhood and record their comments. Then transcribe the tapes and send copies to aunts and uncles, grandparents and cousins. These stories contain a glimpse of the past that would be lost otherwise.
3. How much time should families spend together? That varies from family to family. Families with young children usually spend most of their time together because young children need a great deal of physical care and guidance. Families with teenagers may spend less time together because teens naturally want to spend more time with their friends. Healthy families keep a good balance between 'too much' and 'not enough' time together. They spend enough time to satisfy all family members.
4. Strong families take time to talk to one another. They share their hopes and dreams, feelings and concerns. This involves listening beyond words to the meanings and feelings attached to them. A good listener can better understand and respond to the needs and concerns of others. It means laying aside personal views and really trying to understand the other person's point of view. Even if you don't agree with their opinion, you can make sure you understand them before responding.
5. Members of successful families feel they really belong in their family. Family members feel accepted for what they are and promote one another's self-esteem. They celebrate their victories and help each other learn from mistakes. Sometimes life gets rough and we need all the support we can get. A cheering word from a family member can really come in handy. Put the words on sticky notes and stick them in places where they can be easily found.
6. Strong families develop predictable routines, roles, and rules that govern everyday life and provide for continuity and stability. Reasonably stable patterns empower a family to deal with the many challenges inevitable in family life; without such patterns, chaos would result. At the same time, strong families adapt relationships and family rules when needs arise. The varied circumstances of family life may necessitate individual adaptation. Since no family knows what tomorrow will bring, being adaptive is a good trait for family members to develop.
7. Recent studies affirm the importance of love in families. Research shows that expressions of affection towards children reduce problem behaviours and enhance children's development. Strong families notice and share positive aspects of each member. They notice the talents, skills and achievements, special qualities, and characteristics that make the other person unique. They find ways to be positive even when another family member makes a mistake and make a conscious effort to develop closeness and show love at home.
.. () 2014. .54-55
